Don’t get mad if they hurt you

I recently read an old Buddhist story about forgiveness. 

A teacher and his student are discussing the time someone threw a stone at the student.

“I was so mad at that person” he said.

“Why weren’t you mad at the stone? That’s what hit you!” remarked the teacher.

“The stone had no intention, of course” the student answered, rapidly.

“By that token, you shouldn’t be mad at the person, but at their pain,” counselled the teacher. “The person was as blameless as the stone, being thrown helplessly by their pain.”

While this old fable isn’t always useful, it does raise the possibility of complete forgiveness in many circumstances.

  • The person who “insulted” you on social media
  • The client who didn’t pay you
  • The coach/mentor/supplier who didn’t deliver
  • The guy who didn’t show up on a booked call
  • The business partner who cheated on you

Don’t blame them.

Blame their pain, which you likely know nothing about. 

Then forgiveness comes easy and you can get on with something useful, right?


PS – We’re on a drive to 3,000 members in the JHM Facebook Group. If you’re connected to any coaches, trainers and therapists and they’re not in the Group yet, drop them an invite. If you intro the most new members by this evening – Monday – you get a FREE unlimited coaching session with me, worth £600. Click here for full details!

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